Friday, April 29, 2011

What To Say?

She was one of the first people I met my first year of college. She waited outside my dorm so we could walk to class together. We stayed up late talking on the phone even though we lived on the same campus. We attended church together every Sunday evening. She gave me advice and even though it wasn't always what I wanted to hear, it was what I needed to hear. She and I graduated the same year and got an off campus apartment together. Then we lived together several years later in a different apartment. She tolerated my mess even though I'm sure it drove her crazy. She was one of the first people I called after Rob proposed. She slept over at my house the night before my wedding. She made a beautiful bridesmaid. I was at the hospital the day she delivered her daughter. She is the Godmother of both my children. "Lifelong friend" is an understatement.

This morning my phone rang. The precious baby boy she delivered on Monday has gone to be with God in heaven. Four days old. I didn't get to meet him. She barely got to hold him. He was born prematurely and spent his days in the NICU fighting for his life.

God must really need him in heaven.

What can I say to my dear friend that will be of any help? I can't possibly understand what she is going through.

I spent this evening in silence on the couch, unable to do anything except ask, "Why, why, why? Why!" I will be with my friend in a few days and I pray that I will know what to do and what to say. Maybe all she needs is a good, long hug from an old friend. At this moment, I feel that is all I can offer.

Nothing in life prepares a mother for the death of her child.

1 comment:

  1. Chanel... I don't know what to say either. God gave him the quick trip to heaven, that's for sure... He went from helpless infant to an incalculable intercessor after four days. You and I have taken over 11,000 days to get where we are -- and we're not nearly as close to God as he is.

    All I can say is "The Lord giveth, and the Lord taketh away" which at least reminds me that we are but simple servants to the unseen -- and nothing we do is without either His assistance or guidance. Every breath we take, every morning we wake, every child we conceive, raise -- and eventually let go into the world -- is a gift from God. And we are the willing stewards of His Plan.